Thursday, December 29, 2016

Curve Balls

Always wondered about the curve balls that life sends us.  Is there a purpose or reason behind them?  A lesson to some how be learned?

Sometimes I feel like life gives me too many difficult and puzzling health issues to deal, yet also realize that there is always some one who has it worse.  Though when dealing with certain things it can feel like little consolation as well. 

I've mentioned my heart stuff before, the tachycardia and the very scary skips knowing as pvcs or pacs. Along with a valve issue as well.  Just like anything else they seem to have periods of waxing and waning.  At one point even thought I had managed to deal with the utter fear they can produce until they decided to show their scary selves again. It's easy to believe a fear has been conquered when not experiencing something but when it comes around again reality can feel more like a bitch.

Few weeks ago had some episodes which I blamed on that time of the month, but when they seemed to stick around I panicked.  Hormones definitely plays a part and can be quite an antagonist.  As can stress, caffeine, nicotine, cold weather, etc.  When the skips and racing tend to linger is when the fear sets in.  They are just so dang uncomfortable often times bringing with them hot flashes, sweating and even anxiety.  When they occur at night they make it impossible to even sleep as they will wake one from a deep sleep that's how nerve wrecking the suckers can feel.  

It's impossible to describe unless one has actually experienced them but it's as if someone is squeezing the heart. Skip, spasm and flutter feeling are all good adjectives. Along with feeling hot and sweaty.  Then there is the panic feeling and rush of adrenaline that sets in when they won't go away.  It's as if the body just automatically reacts making it hard to keep calm.  

There have been so many tests run over the years I've lost track of them all.  It doesn't help that heart issues have run in my family history either.  The medicines they prescribe aren't perfect by any means.  While they help they don't prevent them.  Most cardiologists are baffled as to what causes them, why they come and go as they do and no one has any miracle cure for them. 

If you google pacs, pvcs, tachycardi there is plenty of information but little solutions. Most people will experience them but not all will feel them.  Some are more hyper sensitive to them than others so the experts say.  There are many message boards filled with people who not only experience them but also are fearful of them. They aren't like diabetes say that can be controlled with some insulin shots and think that's what scares people the most, the unknowns that come with them. They are a curve ball for sure.

So in the midst of some very scary attacks my mind can't help but wonder why?  Why does anyone have to experience such curve balls?  Are they suppose to be teaching me something?  Quite frankly feel like the only thing they seem to teach is how to feel more fear.  They always say face the fear and it will disappear but I've learned that's much easier said than done.  Just the moment I think I've faced the fear of these, learned to live with them is when they seem to change their course.  It's maddening and mind boggling.

I know for a fact that my life would be different without them and the vertigo.  They have made me into more of a homebody of sorts.  They tug me in a direction I don't always prefer.  I love adventures, fun things, exercise, exploring new places, travel and what not.  Growing up I didn't even feel I needed a tv as I wanted to be doing things not watching them. Some how though over the years the pesky health issues caught up to me and it became harder to do all those things I loved. For that I do feel resentment at times.  

There are moments when I think had these health issues not affected me that may not be where I am today or even with the man.  Before this health stuff someone who loved to watch tv and lounge on the couch wouldn't have even caught my attention. So it's interesting how life works.  And so maybe there is a reason behind them?   Maybe it's life way of leading me on another path, one I wouldn't have chose without the frustrating health stuff.  Maybe there is a reason in many ways it slowed me down some. 

Ugh curve balls they could really drive us all crazy.  If only they came with an explanation or more help in getting through them. 

Image result for curve ball quotes

Image result for curve ball quotes

Wednesday, December 21, 2016

Woof Wednesday

Welcome to Woof Wednesday. Please meet some great dogs from CA, NY, PA and TX all in need of good, loving homes!

Hunter and Nola are Husky mixes who are 4 years old and 40 lbs. We are born pack animals and really, really would love to be adopted together. We are a family dog and love our people and children. We have warmth and love for everyone. We love being active and a fenced in yard would be wonderful for both of us. We are naturally a breed that is clean. We are ok when you step out because we have each other to keep us company. Please lets find them a loving home!

Hunter and Nola - Bells Garden, CA

Miracle Dog Rescue
Bell Gardens, CA 90201
(323) 383-8883

Blossom is a Hound/Labrador Retriever mix who is 2 years old.  The first 4 months of her life she spent most of her time in a crate and if she wasn't in a crate she was pretty much neglected with no kindness ever shown to me. Because of her past she is very shy and timid, sometimes afraid, but is very sweet once she get to know you. She needs a loving home where she can be doted upon and cared for and build my confidence. It is unknown if she gets along with cats. She must have a home with other dogs. She is fearful of the leash so needs a fenced yard, but is housetrained and does like people and kids who are older. If you want to adopt me, you must speak to my foster first.  Please lets find her a great home! 

Blossom - New York, NY

Rescue Dogs Rock, Inc
PO Box 101 Gracie Station
New York, NY 10028

Jenny is a Labrador Retriever & Beagle Mix who is about 5 years old and 30 lbs. She was brought in a stray. Great with people and other dogs She is initially shy but warms up pretty quickly. Please lets find her a good home!

Jenny - Doylestown, PA

Almost Home Dog Rescue
PO Box 132
Doylestown, PA 18901

Fergus is a Australian Cattle Dog/Blue Heeler Mix. He is sweet, affectionate and fun loving dog. He would love to play outside or relax on the couch with you. Good with other dogs and kids. Please lets find him a loving home!

Fergus - Houston, TX

Fergus 2
Adopt A Rescued Friend, Inc
P. O. Box 62736
Houston, TX 77205
(832) 539-4004

No paw left behind our mission!

{Please keep in mind a dog is lifetime commitment. They need attention, love and time just like we do. In addition, adding a pet to the family does cost money in the way of food, health care, training,etc. So before adopting make sure you are willing to make that kind of commitment and have the resources to do so.}

If you want to be a part of Woof Wednesdays email Ann Michele, Lauren or leave a comment. Or simply start posting about dogs in need of a home on your blog or facebook page

Monday, December 19, 2016

Monday Musings

With highs in the 20's it's down right chilly here!  Why does summer always seem too short and winter so long.

The dizziness has been flaring again especially while using computer and watching tv so while I shouldn't even be writing anything, of course here I am. It's not worth it really yet I feel like writing to release my thoughts. The cold temperatures also seem to be flaring my heart issues, which is driving me bonkers.  They are the most uncomfortable, scary things and often leave me frozen in fear. It feels like a spasm of sorts.  The cold of winter seems to make everything worse.  We joke about moving some where warm but maybe warm tropical weather is exactly what we need.

It was another lounging weekend.  Not that we really had a choice as Saturday a winter weather mix brought icy conditions for a good part of the day, making it easier to just stay in.  Sunday I woke up with vertigo so it pretty much sidelined me all day.  All I have to say is vertigo sucks.  Honestly only people that have actually experienced it can understand just how incapacitating it can be.

Not even the man seems to get how it affects everything, nor how dang hard it can be to even just move. What's even worse is having to ask for help with stuff, sometimes it bothers me I even have to ask. Needless to say the weekend felt rather boring and stressful if that makes sense.

Though we did get furniture finally!  That's right Friday night we went out and just bought a leather recliner set from Raymour who guarantees delivery in 3 days as long as it's in stock and not special order.  So it arrived today.  It's a little bit of a compromise as I'm afraid leather will feel too cold for someone like me who is always cold but it was the nicest looking of the ones we liked and it was available now.  It's amazing how many furniture places have waiting periods of 6-8 weeks, and even then the furniture is not ready. So I compromised and we went with leather.

Decided to give away the white leather sofa since it was given to us.  Hopefully it finds a home with someone who really needs it.

There has been so much going on that it doesn't even feel the holiday season. The man has been super busy at work.  There has been so much to do around here.  Keeping up with my nephew Dylan is nuts he is starting to get into everything and likes to be in constant motion or he tends to cry. Haven't even really listened to much christmas music.  Every year I say we should go look at all the Christmas lights yet some how it doesn't seem to happen.  Really have to work on changing that as it's so pretty when everything is glowing and lit up.

Right now just feeling a lot of anxiety and stress about everything. We still have a list of things we need to do.  It's truly been a whirlwind of a year filled with so much change and craziness at times.

And while the holidays can bring festive feelings it can also feel overwhelming.  I just want to stay home this year, yet now that we are officially married the man thinks I should go to his family's house for xmas even though he doesn't really want to go and they usually just end up fighting.  After the whole fiasco with his mother regarding the wedding and other issues going there is not something I have any interest in so technically I am being forced to do. ha  In fact think it's what bringing on some of this horrible anxiety, as the thought of it brings on a major fight or flight response.  The body is amazing as it speaks for our deeper feelings and thoughts sometimes.

Well dinners almost finished cooking and really shouldn't be on here anyway as it's only frying my brain more.

Hopefully I can find a way to relax and enjoy the holidays.

Tuesday, December 13, 2016

Monday Musings

The weather has turned much colder here with winter like temperatures, needless to say we are missing summer.  And since winter hasn't even officially begun it's not good to be missing summer just yet. ha

Funny how the moment it turns cold we start daydreaming of warm places to live.  The man says he could work from anywhere but not sure that is true just yet as now he is managing others and sitting in a boat load of meetings might be hard to do effectively from a remote location.  He could possibly work more from home but he chooses to go in probably due to the fact that he finds it hard to get motivated at home. So think it will be awhile until he opts to work officially remote.

What a day the nephew has wheels and is mobile with a new walker.  Talk about craziness even Cooper is running from him. ;)  He had a poop explosion which involved taking a bath in his blow up duck tub.  The things they have these days for kids is awesome, much easier than the era in which we grew up. By the way what happened to diapers keeping poop in?  Literally he has these poop explosion which result in poop leaking out everywhere.  It makes is very challenging to clean up. Every day I have more admiration for mothers as just not sure how they do it all. 

The weekend was mellow.  We basically lounged on the sofa watching football. Friday we watched some more Ray Donovan.  Saturday we went out to get a tree and decorated it too.  Sunday was football followed by more Ray.  The man loves those type weekends where I tend to get a little bored. There is only so much lounging and watching tv one can handle before feeling ancy or bored.  Think I'd rather be out taking part in some of the holiday festivities instead.  All though I must admit it felt good to just relax as it's been a whirl wind lately. 

Still can't decide on furniture. In my opinion there has to be a sofa that meets all our desires. The man would be content on the leather one we saw but I'm worried leather will feel cold.  Plus don't like the fact it only comes in a power recliner option as he love seat will leave wires running across.  And the other sofa we liked would take 6-8 weeks special order but since we didn't have a good experience taking that route with the couch we just cancelled we feel leary of doing that. Bean bags sound like a great idea at this point! 

Meanwhile I've been dealing with a dizziness flare.  It's so annoying as it affects everything especially sleep. Just want to be able to read and use a computer again without having to deal with it. Add to that crazy hormones and there are some days I wonder what it must be like to be a man.  They just seem to have it so much easier than women. Yup I said it and mean it. 

So I mentioned we started marathon watching Ray Donovan.  So far still like SOA better.  Ray is an entertaining show for sure but his stolid personality, combined with his lying and cheating ways get to be a bit too much. As I'm watching the show just want to punch the guy and say wake up dude stop being a jerk off. ha

Okay back to reality have to figure out what is causing the washer to trip the GFCI outlet.  Then I'm going back to listening to some classical music and trying to chill for a little.

Wednesday, December 7, 2016

Woof Wednesday

Welcome to Woof Wednesday. Please meet some great dogs from CA, NY, PA and TX all in need of good, loving homes!

Beto is a Dachshund Chihuahua mix who is 1 year old and 15 lbs. We rescued Beto from a a home in L.A. where he was abandon along with another dog because the dogs owner is going to jail for a very long time. Beto has a balanced, sweet, loving, goofy, and affectionate personality. He may be a little shy when first experiencing a new environment, but give him a few moments, and he’ll blossom right before your eyes! It won’t be long before he’s pawing your foot gently for more pets. He walks great on a leash and rides great on a car. He is not a barker Beto gets along wonderfully with other dogs, and given his size and age, he’ll be able to transition easily into a home with feline and children as well.  Please lets find him a loving home!

Beto - Bells Garden, CA

Miracle Dog Rescue
Bell Gardens, CA 90201
(323) 383-8883

Bruno is a  Basset hound Coon hound mix  who is 1 year old  and 50 pounds. He is an adorable big boy with short legs. He is strong and playful but obedient dog. He is friendly with adults, children and all other dogs and ignore cats. He knows how to walks on a leash and rides great on cars. He is very well behaved inside the house. In yard, he likes to run and play with his buddies and toys but he does not destroy things. Bruno is not a barker but he is an excellent guard dog. He is 100% house trained too. He loves to go for short and long walks. He is an excellent dog companion and enjoy to play with children. His ideal home would be with a family who likes outside activities or who likes to take a daily walks. Please lets find him a great home!

Bruno - Bells Garden, CA

Miracle Dog Rescue
Bell Gardens, CA 90201
(323) 383-8883

Yara is a 1 year old Terrier mix.  She is sitting in a shelter just hoping to find a family to call her own.  Please lets find her a good home!

Yara - New York, NY

Best Friends Animal Society New York
New York City, NY 10011

Carole King is a Labrador Retrieve who is 7 years old and 50 lbs. This sweet girl sat in a shelter for over a year.  When our rescue team met her, it was a no brainer  we knew it was time to remove the chains and bail a sister out. Carol is very sweet with humans and currently working on her manners with other dogs.  She loves the outdoors and has lots of energy.  She has an adorable underbite and this hippie gal is simply badass to the bone. Please lets find her a loving home! 

Carol King - Brooklyn, NY

Carole King
Badass Animal Rescue
Brooklyn, NY 11249

 Sophie is a Cocker Spaniel.  She is senior sweetheart and staff favorite.  She's nine years old with lots of love to give and is looking for a happy, patient home. Please lets find her a great home!

Sophie - Philadelphia, PA

Morris Animal Animal Refuge
1242 Lombard StreetPhiladelphia, PA 19147

Brewster is a Wheaten Terrier who is 3 years old. Brewster is back with his original foster mom. He had been adopted as a pup but unfortunately, circumstances forced major changes and this silly sweet boy came back. After just a few days, he broke out of his anxious state and began running and playing with the rest of the foster dogs in the home. He is a love and a goofy boy.  Enjoys running and jumping in the yard with the rest of the pack. He is happy and wants to please. He does have a lot of energy, so needs a home with another dog to play with or a family who is active that will keep him going. He enjoys his quiet time on the sofa snuggling, as well.  Please lets find him a good home!

Brewster Rio - Houston, TX

Brewster Rio
Adopt A Rescued Friend, Inc
P. O. Box 62736
Houston, TX 77205
(832) 539-4004

No paw left behind our mission!

{Please keep in mind a dog is lifetime commitment. They need attention, love and time just like we do. In addition, adding a pet to the family does cost money in the way of food, health care, training,etc. So before adopting make sure you are willing to make that kind of commitment and have the resources to do so.}

If you want to be a part of Woof Wednesdays email Ann Michele, Lauren or leave a comment. Or simply start posting about dogs in need of a home on your blog or facebook page

Monday, December 5, 2016

Monday Musings

The weather appears to be turning more winter like, does anyone truly like cold weather?

Overall still busy working on the house.  Trying to finish up things here and there.  The furniture never arrived, which left both of us rather after waiting over 3 months we cancelled the order.  Mealey's didn't even try to convince us not to, they just refunded our account immediately. Guessing they knew something we didn't and that the furniture wasn't close to being delivered like they promised.  If it was then you think they would have convinced us to wait it out.

So now back to squarer one.  The furniture we ordered for the living room won't be available for at least 6 weeks. Though we did decide to buy the matching floor model chair which is coming in handy. We got two non matching chairs in the living room now and one very old leather couch that a neighbor gave us in the family room.  Yeah I know things could be worse but it would just be nice to have some furniture so we could invite family friends over to see the new house. The search is back on for family room furniture, still can't believe we waited over 3 months for furniture that was never delivered. ha

Friday we went searching for furniture and out to dinner at fridays which was an odd experience. What happened to Fridays....their menu has shrunk, the service was sub par and the place was empty.  The restaurants used to be so popular that one had to wait 45 mins on a weekend night but not anymore.  Feel like they are on the verge of closing soon.

Saturday involved more house stuff hanging curtain rods, a trip to Lowes and Target.  Saturday night was all about football.  Penn State vs Wisconsin for the Big Ten Championship.  Felt nervous watching the game especially with Wisconsin leading all of first half but Penn State came back to win the game.  We are Penn State!  And yes I feel we should have made the playoffs especially in place of Washington who has an easy schedule.

Sunday we were back to browsing for furniture.  Though the man doesn't really like having to do any thing on weekends as it interferes with his sports watching.  He spends way too much time working on his sportsboss and not  nearly enough just having fun with us on weekends!

The nephew and Cooper are keeping me busy during the week. As I'm write this I'm feeling rather tired. That's the problem though...I feel sleepy early, start dozing way too early and then I'm waking up way too early.

It's been almost a year since we were on the search for a new tv show to marathon watch.  After Sons of Anarchy we weren't sure what to start nor if anything live up to how amazing it was.  We tried Narcos but all the subtitles just made it hard to get into.  So we just started Ray Donovan the man seems to love it already, I'm on the fence but will say it is entertaining.  Though the guys in the show aren't nearly as hot as in SOA. ;)

Haven't been feeling like writing much lately.  Probably has a lot to do with the dizziness that's been flaring up again.  Looking at the computer, phone and even tv seem to only be instigating the whole thing.  Thoughts or ideas will come to me that I want to write about but actually putting them down seems to take a backseat these days.

And I have to mention that all the political posts on social media are driving me crazy.  I just want to scream people Trump won, get over it and move on.  Too many people are whining.  Do these same people realize that every election half the country isn't happy about who won but you don't hear them constantly whining about it or criticizing the newly elected.  Give the guy a chance before you start making all these harsh, critical judgments.  We didn't want Obama elected but we never whined all over social media about it for 8 years.  That's the problem though we all get stuck on things instead of learning how to move past the things that bother us.

Anyway, time to make dinner!

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