Monday, November 28, 2016

Monday Musings

The weather is hovering around 50's not warm but not too cold just yet.  During last weeks high winds we were sure we would lose power but the lights only flickered.   So on a mild, windless weather day like today whoever would have thought we would lose power, and yet we did. Go figure.

Losing power though reminded me of just why we wanted gas powered heat and stove top, as both can still be used during an outage.  While the fireplace wasn't a must have it's something we secretly desired and are thankful for as well during such moments.

It was a rather crazy day, then again the weekend felt that way as well.  Surprised it isn't a full moon or something.

While watching my nephew today he had an explosive poop to the point it covered his little body.  Of course it's not like we have a kid tub, so had to improvise.  There is nothing quite like finding poop everywhere. There was even poop stuck to our tub that had to be scrubbed and bleached. It's funny while I seem to be able to handle dog poop rather fine, human poop sets me over the edge. The germaphobe peeks out to quickly access what needs to be wiped down a million times with bleach. haha

The week was busy.  Wednesday my niece joined the nephew for at half the day, so had two kids to not only watch but entertain.  It's amazing the attention spam of kids, they just go from one thing to the next. The man was home so he joined in the fun too.  Him and I spent the afternoon picking up leaves and trying to accomplish some tasks around the house.  By evening we were wiped and sleeping by 9.

Thursday we went to my family's house for Thanksgiving.  It's always nice spending time with everyone.  Right now we realize how quickly kids grow up, so we are trying to appreciate the moments we get to spend with my niece and nephew before they become teenagers who want nothing to do with us adults.  We ate plenty, at least two helpings for this chick.  Though I paid for it later in the way of a stomache that kept me awake for a little.

We pretty much just spent Friday lounging in bed, napping and watching tv.  In fact we even ate dinner in bed!  Sometimes you just have to give in and enjoy those type of days.  I'm usually poor at being able to sit around and doing nothing but on this occasion it felt much needed.

Saturday the man's mother came down from Long Island to visit but as often happens the visit turrned into a stressful, tension filled house.  She hadn't even been here a hour before she was complaining that the man was ignoring her, and choosing to watch a game over spending time with her.  Even though he told her it wasn't a good day to visit, that he would be watching Michigan as it was a big game and to come later she didn't listen.  Honestly she never does, she just does what she wants. So when she started ranting to me I said look I'm not getting in the middle, if you have an issue with him talk to him about it.

Yet she expects others to respect what she tells them. Such as the past when she told the man quite a few times her house was a mess and she didn't want me coming with him to visit. Even when she was in hospital and the man might need support with him, she told him she didn't want me coming.  I remember how hurt and offended I felt but she didn't care. Or when we did come to visit in the past I slept on couch with some old, dusty blanket. She never even had any breakfast available. Then she forbid us bringing the dog so over the years it felt less stressful and easier to stay home.

Oh the drama has been going on for years and she wonders why I don't want to come visit now, because she has never gone out of her way to make me feel at home.  She preaches that she has changed, she is all spiritual,etc, yet the way she acts does not always indict that.  There's just a long list of things that have happened over the years, even her being unkind at the rehearsal dinner of our wedding that continues to push me further and further away from wanting to be around her.  I literally go into the flight or fight adrenaline reaction when she's around now, it's not good to feel that stressed or upset around anyone. Not sure what is going to happen.

Anyway talking about it doesn't do any good, as if someone doesn't see any wrong in their actions things just won't change.

Sunday I went to do some errands but of course had a vertigo attack in the middle of a giant Walmart. Honestly just froze hoping I could at least walk a semi straight line to get to car. Then it's trying to sit and wait it out to see what kind of attack it will or won't turn into. Ugh it's so ridiculously frustrating and guessing it was brought on by all the stress felt saturday. Like all the specialists I've seen say stress makes can make worse any condition.  Though honestly it's very hard to remain calm when feeling the fight or flight adrenaline response come on.  I say this all too often but need to get back to meditating and trying to really learn the art of mindfulness meditation.

Anyway eventually came home, ate lunch and tried to relax a little then set out to finish the banister. The amount of work it involved was surprising and still have the steps to do.  While the man napped and watched football there was me finishing up what I started on the banister, only took 4 hours! Think the man has no idea how much work and time I've been putting into renovating our house, if he did he would be offering to rub my sore muscles every day! haha

Oh and though the furniture store promised the sofa and love seat would be here by now it still has yet to arrive.  Some people have said it's fairly common for furniture stores to promise one thing and it be delayed.  That doesn't seem fair, these furniture places should be held to higher standards when people are spending their hard earned money on such pricey items that have such a huge mark up to begin with.  Some day soon we might actually have real furniture to sit on!  Beginning to think we should have just bought bean bags or something. ha

That's the story and though I didn't set out to write as much this sure turned into a long winded tale of rants. Guess all the pent up adrenaline from the weekend wants to release itself. ;)

Well at least there is a photo to share this week, a thanksgiving one of course...filled with the people I'm most thankful for in life.  Though some how our dog and the nephew were too busy to get in the photo!

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