Friday, July 6, 2012


"Be tolerant of yourself and others. Don't give into frustration. Demonstrate calm stability with persistent courage in trying circumstances. You do have the strength of character needed in adversity. Do not let your emotions control your actions at this time."

Found comfort in those words today.   It feels like adversity has been hanging around a little too long. 
Even find myself struggling with write how I really feel or simply sugar coat everything to sound peachy.  

There has been much going on lately, stressful moments yet there is also a weird sense of boredom as well.  My mind is trying to process so much right now that the circuits feel overloaded and almost burned out.  Stress is a weird thing.  A little can almost be motivating, but too much almost causes a shut down. 

Find myself wanting to vent about things. But I don't want to necessarily go there, yet it's whats most influencing my life, feelings and thoughts at the moment.   There have been moments of hurtful words or lack there of words, miscommunications galore, broken promises, utter procrastination, lack of appreciation/respect, hurt feelings, lots of stress, financial woes and just not knowing what to believe sometimes.  The feeling like I'm trying when no one else cares.  Even trying to get people to commit to any type of plan, fun or mini vacation has been impossible lately.  Trying to plan family get togethers even turns into a hassle.  I'm trying hard but life is simply not cooperating. 

Nothing feels in sync lately, maybe mercury is in retrograde?  :) 

Anyway, what good does it really do to focus on such feelings as I hate to dwell yet I feel stuck in that mode. Actually stuck is a good word as that is overall how I feel.  But I need to get out of that mode, and unload the stress that is weighing me down.  Now if only the universe would show me the way.  A little guidance from above never hurt. 

Kind of like that Jerry Maguire movie where the guy says "show me the money" I think in this situation "show me the happiness" would be just fine.  Although "show me less stress and more money" would be great as well.  I mean who doesn't wish for more money.  Oh I know it's not the key to happiness but it sure does make life a little easier.  : )   Anyway....

I did find some thing interesting on the internet while searching for ideas on how to relieve stress.  And came across a great article on Mindfulness Meditation.  The studies done on it are amazing, even the Marines are using it.  I've tried meditation in the past but never studied a certain technique and always had trouble sitting still.  This is something I am definitely going to make a conscious effort to learn though it sounds worth it.  If you google it you can find even more information about it.

So off to learn Mindfulness Meditation I go.  Better to do something then nothing!  :)

.  .  And the process of learning how to live with things that cannot always be changed when we want them to be.

Yes sometimes stress can feel like a storm.  Those stressful things of life coming at us from all angles like the powerful winds of a hurricane,and we have to somehow hang on until those winds stop blowing. 

My soul has gotten to a point where it even feels broken. 

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