Monday, November 2, 2009

Thoughts On Niceness

Somedays I feel like being nice gets you no where. Does anyone appreciate niceness or recognize it?

There are honestly those moments when I think a line can be crossed between being too nice, and not sticking up for oneself.

Take for instance this morning....my landlord came over to do work on the house. None of the other apartments answered their door(none of them work), my boyfriend laid in bed, so I....who was up getting ready for work answered the door.

I had to listen to a lecture about all the stuff that needed to be done...like the couch that was sitting outside, suppose to be disposed of months ago by my man. Yes I know it needs to be trashed but lecture my bf its his responsbility. Besides, the guy upstairs has been keeping his hitch in the drive way, is he getting told to move it or getting fined if he doesn't? Does she realize how much work and responsibility I put into her place that I get no profit from.

Sometimes niceness does get taken for granted people don't appreciate it. Like this weekend....we carved pumpkin for my boyfriends little brother and it was I who ended up scrubbing the floor and kitchen of all the pumpkin stuff. (my man got to come home and hop in bed) That is besides cleaning the house this weekend, doing all the laundry which means running up and down basement stairs from 8-8 because the laundry machine only does small loads. Vacumming and cleaning was the last thing that I wanted to do. But I have a dog with severe allergies so things have to be kept clean.

In fact, I'm starting off Monday feeling sheerly exhausted. And sometimes I just feel that when your nice, when you do nice things, that they seem to go unappreciated. Almost like people take for granted you are there and you will just do them.

When does niceness just turn into being a doormat somedays. Am I suppose to just let people give me their word or make promises only to break it, and not be upset or say anything? Am I suppose to just put up with a landlord who takes forever to fix things but demands things be done asap when she finally decides to care? Am I suppose to just not say anything when my day tends to get cancelled often even though it means a lot to me? Know what I mean? One can be nice but they also should be able to express when they feel others aren't being nice.

I go out of my way to be nice to people, I make sure to treat others as I would want to be treated, but sometimes when I feel that niceness gets overlooked or crapped upon, well then yes I am going to speak up for myself or get upset. And I have the right to feel that way sometimes because I'm not going to be nice to someone who I feel disrespects me or isn't being nice to me.

I am a very simple person all I require is people be nice, compassionate, honest, be loyal, respect, and communicate openly. It's when people don't honor that, that then makes me feel my niceness is being taken for granted.

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